The Forest

The Forest. It’s untamed depths can be a place to relax and unwind, unplug and get back to a simpler state. It can be a substitute for the gym, where you can train in the open air maybe even barefoot. The Forest can be a place to get lost, either on purpose or by accident. It’s also a place you can die - likewise on purpose or by accident. Yes, that’s a bit dramatic but it doesn’t make it any less true. You can find yourself in the Forest unexpectedly- maybe by misfortune or maybe by mistake - turning a nature hike to a full on fight for your life. It’s a centuries-old tale of man against nature and man’s own will to conquer or lay down and die. A story that still captivates our imagination and stirs romanticized thoughts of survival and triumph over not a singular adversary but an entire environment, be that the Alaskan Bush in the dead of winter or the jungles of the Amazon, where everything from the weather to the animals to the water is out to end your meek existence.

I’m not here to tell the tale of that Forest. I’m here to tell the story of being lost in the Forest of your own mind where we can lose sight of our purpose. The rut, the grind, the bubble, whatever you want to call it. It’s common sense that you will lose sight of the objective if you’re microscopically focused solely on immediate obstacles. Most will journey through their life wholly in their bubble, interacting and reacting only when they need to, doing the necessary things but little else. They do their jobs to make their wage. Maybe they get some small satisfaction, probably they don’t. Maybe they just pay their mortgage, bills, feed the kids, and get away a couple of weekends here and there.

We, however, seek more than that standard day-to-day subsistence, choosing to Live as hard as we can - not to simply exist. We seek out the opportunities to test not only our physicality and intelligence, but our grit and resolve; believing the glory is found in the struggle. Rock climbing to skateboarding to skydiving to powerlifting to racing motorcycles to taking up with redheaded women - all different but all require a high physical, mental, willpower ratio.

But even the things we seek out to achieve a uncommon life can become a new Forest we get lost in. We will use Brazilian Jiu Jitsu for illustration here, but it could be anything that requires strength, brains, and balls. When you first start BJJ, it is like trying to learn how to walk, tie a Windsor knot, and conjugate verbs in Russian without knowing the alphabet yet - all at the same time. Everything is new and looks like some sort of crazy sorcery, a partner-assisted forced yoga. You train and train and think you’ve started to understand basic body positions and pressure only to be reassured during rolling that you in fact do not understand even basic body positions and pressure. It seems like two steps forward and nine steps back sometimes. Days turn into weeks turn into months turn to a year, maybe two or three. These things can come to a point of frustration and come perilously close to contempt. You doubt your skills, you doubt your techniques, you doubt your coach, perhaps you even doubt your desire.

This is normal. And, it’s just the first big test on a path that will be littered with trials. It sucks and it’s hard and almost everyone quits right about this time. Where you really get in trouble is when you start comparing it with “regular life”. Regular life requires so very little of us that it’s really no comparison at all. Regular life is relatively easy compared to what we deliberately subject ourselves to, those challenges we need to make us feel whole and alive. That’s the point, right? Here’s where the forest can swallow you up if you are unable to see the progress you’ve already made, only aware of only the road ahead and never turning back to recognize how far you’ve come. Sometimes a glance over the shoulder is a good way to put shit in perspective. Sometimes you just need to have fucking FUN! Quit being so goddamn serious about it, that helps too. No matter what it is you do, you should always have a little smile on your face during, and a big smile at the end. How great does it feel to be spent and invigorated all at the same time? You used to watch others make magic and now you can make some of your own. The road to self improvement and satisfaction in BJJ and any other ballsout pursuit isn’t a road at all. It is not even a trail. At best, it’s a compass, an azimuth, a pace count. At worst, it’s just a cardinal direction.

Sometimes the forest is full of wait-a-minute-vines and Draw Monsters. Those are the times when you can’t see 3 feet in front of your face. Sometimes the forest breaks open to a rocky ridge line with no vegetation where you can see for miles. The terrain is always changing and while it may sometimes feel familiar, it will never be the same. Do you want to know the secret? Do you want to know the all important life hack that will make everything just so much easier? Well here it is: “Trust your compass and just keep fucking walking.” When it feels like it’s just too much work or too far or too dark or the rain is pouring and the wind is howling, just keep walking - and while you’re walking, remember WHY you started. I promise you, with my whole heart, that there’s a clearing just up ahead. A place where it will get easier to walk for a while. A place where you can rest while still progressing. If you stop now, you’ll never see it.

I can make you one other promise and that’s that the next hard leg is coming. Just keep walking.